Religion ......

It's been  a long time since I posted anything last, and I was looking at some "quotes" and stumpled over:


"God only puts you through things he knows you can handle, so when live is hard it is because God knows you kan handle it"


and

"I know one person, who will never let me go. God"


And it made me think of, how much I hate this "God". And how much I hate "Religion". What's the use for it? I mean, fine! If you wonna believe in God, then do it. But why start a group that says: "Believe in God! Our God! Because God loves all, but if you don't believe in him, we'll kill you and he'll hate you!" instead of keeping that kind of scary shit to yourself?
To be honest, it scared me a little. Religion I mean. Especially the Christians...
The way everything they do becomes an almost demonic obsession and that God told them to do it.
If God excist he's a psycho ass bastard who thinks he's greater than anybody else and who makes people do the stupidest things. God loves you my ass.
Funny, how much this hatred against anything religious has grown since I was a little girl. When I was a little girl I did believe in God. And I loved God. I even praid once in a while.
The years went by and I began carring less and less about this God person. When the time og being Confirmed was here, I told everybody "Yes. I do believe in God." but didn't mean it. I did it for the party and the gifts. Of course I could've just choosen a Non-firmation, but I wanted to be in a church. I've always loved churches. They're pretty. But being inside one always makes me nervous. I have no idea why.
Anyway,
I went ahead becoming a Wiccan. I liked the way, it was so different from any other religion and how there was no rules to follow. I mean, of course there were rules, but it was nowhere as extreme as any other religion. And for once I actually looked up to the God. I think one of the things I liked the most about was that one of the most important things in Wicca was The Goddess. A female. Finally a female "headmaster". But the interrest quickly died down, as I got new interrests.
And since then I've just carried a hatred that has grown and grown inside of me, to such extremes that everytime I hear someone say "I love god" or "God protects you" I feel disgusted. I hate him. I hate it.
God wont fucking protect you or love you, because God doesn't care about you, because God doesn't excist. You're on your own, and the only persons to protect you and love you is the ones you love, and yourself.
Human is selfish. I've always thought so. No matter how hard you try, you can't do something for one another without thinking to yourself "What will I get out, of doing this?" and that's why you can't do something for God.
"I did it for God." great excuse. Won't give you any help in real life. But if you wonna believe in that, FINE. Do it. Just don't drag me into it.
....